Hello friends! If you have been wondering where I've been, don't feel bad. I have wondered that myself lately. I have been gearing up for a big chemistry test being given this Thursday. So between studying and procrastinating in cleaning the house, I've been busy!
Recently I have been contemplating the plight of parents with young children. I love my kids, but sometimes I feel like I am letting Mike and the church at large down due to my lack of participation. I know that modern preachers wives aren't expected to be free church labor anymore, but the truth is, I really WANT to be free church labor. If I had the choice, I could spend all of my free time at the church helping out with various committees. I miss the old days before everything was outsourced, when a group of people would gather every Thursday morning to fold and stuff bulletins. I wish I could spend every night practicing choir and handbells, attending Emmaus reunion groups and Beth Moore bible studies. My kids keep me tied to a nursery/preschool /Sunday school/naptime/bedtime regimen that falls on me to organize and enforce since Mike's schedule is never dependable. I yearn for the days when the kids are older and more self sufficient, and yet I would slow down time in a heartbeat to keep my sweet ones as little and precious as they are now.
I have heard several comments over the years, some directly to me and others from conversations I'm not a part of, about how uninvolved I seem to be with the church, or at least that I'm never around. I don't make apologies for this, even though it does sometimes weigh heavily on my mind. We have been blessed with a growing church that has many needs, most of which are behind the scenes. Ask any mom and she will tell you "I know the kids in (preschool...youth...nursery), but don't ask me who anyone else is!). What an awesome and life consuming thing raising children can be!
I don't want you to think this is a "This is what I do with my time, so butt out" type of rant. Not at all. Especially since most of you who are reading are fully empathetic with my situation. This is more of an "I understand what you are going through" type of post. I am huge on not judging anyone whose shoes I haven't walked in. And I'll be the first to admit that there are some people's shoes that I pray never fit me.
The pastor who conducted our premarital counseling gave us a lot of good advice. One piece of advice was that God should always come first, but sometimes God and church are not the same thing. Our personal relationship with God first, then our family, then our other obligations, including church. If being so busy at church enables you to avoid the trials your family is going through, then I don't personally believe that God honors that time you serve as a sacrifice. Just like using your family as an excuse not to keep your commitments in bible study or worship does not honor God. Family and worship should balance and compliment each other. And as Christian parents, we are obligated to show our children that God is a priority in our lives through our service to Him and others. Clear as mud? Probably. But at least it is something to think about!
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