Words of Life and Death

As you are now aware, I love to read and write. I'm not saying my handwriting is fabulous, or that I love all aspects of the written language (sentence structure and punctuation do not inspire me to write poetry). But in general, I love words.

Have you heard the expression "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say it at all"? If not, your mother is obviously not from the South. I heard that constantly while I was growing up. I was very shy growing up, so I had no problem whatsoever keeping my mouth shut. It has paid off in huge dividends as an adult, and as a preacher's wife. This little piece of advice from my mom, and little nuggets from my dad such as "A man is only as good as his word" have followed me wherever life has taken me.

It is fascinating to me how we are inundated with words every day. Especially with the coming of the information age. But there has been a noted downturn in manners and the honesty of our words. Lies are a slippery slope that begins as a white lie or a half truth. I'm not saying these aren't necessary from time to time, but have you noticed how every time you fib a little, it gets easier? That is a very dangerous thing to take lightly, my friend! I had a friend in college who commuted from another state (about a 45 minute drive). We would invite him to go somewhere with us, and he would ALWAYS say yes. And then, 80% of the time, he wouldn't show up. At first, we just thought things kept coming up. But after one of these no show incidents, I found out that the family event that prevented him from showing up wasn't some last minute thing. He had known about it for weeks and had said he would go out with us just because it was easier for him to apologize than explain why he couldn't come. Needless to say, we stopped inviting him, and he had to start inviting himself.

I have another friend who has no filter on her mouth. Anything she thinks comes straight out of her mouth, good or bad. She laughs and tells everyone not to pay attention to half of what she says. But how do we know which half to ignore? Should we listen to her one day and ignore her the next? I 'm sure what she meant was not to pay attention to the bad stuff. **But that's the thing about words.

ONCE A WORD PASSES YOUR LIPS, NO APOLOGY IS GOING TO GET IT BACK.

Oh, friends, that little playground saying "sticks and stones can break my bones, but lies will never hurt me" can be so far from the truth to some people. There is a common theme in the world of self help right now about speaking words of life and death. If this is a new concept for you, then pay close attention:

The distinction between words of life and death is very simple. Words of life affirm, and words of death destroy. Whatever comes out of your mouth, you can't get back. It takes root in the heart of the hearer, and is so hard to weed out. Even if the only person to hear the words is you yourself! Some people say that if they are struggling, then venting their frustrations verbally tends to help relieve stress. But we should be so careful about even that. Those words of death can turn right back around and lodge in our own hearts. Focusing on the negative perpetuates the cycle of negativity, and the only one who can save you is yourself. You must be determined to change your outlook. It is a day by day, hour by hour, minute by minute struggle, but I know you can do it! And the first step is to speak words of life. If you are like me and feel a little wacko by looking in the mirror and talking to yourself, start by speaking words of life over someone else. Instead of snapping at your spouse or kids, try finding something to compliment them on. And heck, speak the ultimate words of life and tell them you love them. AND MEAN IT!

I promise you, friend, it doesn't matter how bad your life gets, if you are speaking words of life instead of death, good things will happen to that little seed in your heart.