Inlaws and Outlaws

We just recently had a weekend visit from my inlaws. The live pretty far away, so we only get to see them a few times a year. I have some friends who are happy to see their inlaws even less than that, but I like my inlaws. It is probably part of my stubborness, to be honest. 'Inlaw' is almost a dirty word in our society. Thanks to television we all have preconcieved notions of the dreaded relationship with our spouse's family. I hate preconcieved notions like that, so when I got married I was determined to prove the stereotype wrong, because, dear friends, it takes two to make a relationship. Kindness goes a long way in creating the foundation for a relationship, even though it may take years to build the foundation!

I was reading in the book of Ruth this morning. What an amazing woman Ruth was. Many books and sermons have been written about her and her faithfulness. But what about Naomi? What kind of amazing mother-in-law must she have been to have inspired such devotion in both her daughters-in-law? I truly want to know this, because I have two children and daily I pray for the people they will eventually marry. I pray that they are God fearing and strong of character, and I pray that they will let me love them like I love my own children. Because right there in the Bible it says that when a man and woman marry, two shall become one. Some women think that no one will be good enough for their children to marry. We I say pooh on that! If your child loves someone, then YOU BE the example. Don't expect your child's spouse to understand how your family works, and don't expect your child to explain it. Treat them with the respect you would show a new friend, instead of how you treat your own child (as if they were still 10 years old and in need of a good lecture). Remember- this person will contribute to half the DNA your grandchild will carry, and will contribute much to the type of person your grandchild will become. Don't wait until the last moment to make these decisions. Decide now the kind of inlaw you want to be. It is never too late to start over, and it is never too early to make resolutions. And whenever you feel discouraged, read the book of Ruth and ask yourself if your child's spouse would ever feel that way about you, and if you answer 'no', then ask yourself 'why not?'.

The Tide Turns...And The Eagle Soars

So, it's football season. FINALLY! Here in the South, the anticipation of the next football season begins the day after the National Championship is played (for those who have a stake in it), or at least the day after the last game played. It builds until the air is thick with expectation. Birthday parties and vacations are planned around when Bama will be in town, or where Auburn is traveling away. I think it is so great that you can become instant friends with someone you've never met, just because you have a favorite team in common.

But do you know my favorite team? Not Auburn (I know, shocker!). It isn't even a sports group at all. It is the tall red headed guy and two sweet little miracles that I get to come home to every day. At various times we are all coaches and players ( like when Bill is telling me the correct way to drive a toy train :). I think parents lose something in the relationship with their children when they stop thinking that they have nothing to learn from their kids. The biggest thing kids teach us is how to love. LOVE. HUG. KISS. LAUGH. What is more important in life than knowing how to do these things? A family may have a leader, but a successful family's leader knows when to lead, and when to learn.

I thought when I started my new job that I would be miserable in the fact that I would miss my kids too much. But although I DO miss my kids, the time I have with them is so much sweeter! I guess it's true that absence makes the heart grow fonder. I just have to make sure that absence doesn't overshadow the quality time. A time for everything in it's season....I hope your times are as sweet as mine!